Dear Diary,
by jaguar1223
Summary: Sequel to This is One of the Last Times. Sora, Roxas, Namine and Kairi, pour their hearts and souls into their diaries. Flashbacks commence and you see how their lives or deaths carry on. RxN SxK
1. Sora's Confession

(23/03/2028)  
Dear Diary,

It's been almost eighteen years since I talked to my sister.

Well, eighteen years since she spoke back. I speak to her all the time. And it's been killing me inside, I love her to pieces, I have since the first moment I laid eyes on her. And I always will. I speak to her all the time.

You see, eighteen years ago, it was Roxas' funeral.

Eighteen years ago, my sister took my car out to the beach, climbed up the Cliffside and stepped away from death, according to eyewitnesses and got shot. She died on impact with the bullet.

My sister, diagnosed with depression decided not to kill herself and got shot.

And it was my 'best friend' that did it. Well. He was. My best friend killed my baby sister and I couldn't stop him.

All I could do was find justice for her, and justice I did find. And when they locked Riku up, I smiled, well I tried my best. It's hard to smile a month after your baby sister died, the one you used to protect all on your own, one time ruined her best friend's car just so they wouldn't drive off into the sunset. But they still managed to get away from me, although I would have rather them drove off into the sunset.

But, I pray that they are happy and I pray that my little Nami watches over my children.

I have a daughter, who looks exactly like her. Kairi let me call her Namine, Nami would have loved her, heck she would have loved them all. Nami, Axel, Roxas and Xion. And they would have all loved their Aunt Nami, and a soon as their all old enough to know, I'm going to tell them about their brave, smart, artistic, funny, lovable and annoying Aunt Nami. Who would have spoilt them rotten and given them all enough love to last them a hundred lifetimes.

Kairi, on the other hand will tell them about Uncle Roxi. Funny, brave, kind, stupid Uncle Roxi. Who would have taught them some many things we couldn't.

Like how to make Aunt Nami blush with one look.

Or how to bounce a coin on your head.

Or how to live like there's no tomorrow. Well, we might be able to teach them that, but not like the master.

Oh, how I resent Roxas for taking my sweet, innocent Nami away from me, before and after his death. How he made her so sad. I remember the last time we had a proper talk. Like it was yesterday.

"_Sora," Namine came walking into my room." I can't sleep. Can I talk to you for a bit?"_

"_Sure, "I put down my controller and patted the bed next to me. "What do you want to talk about?"_

"_I just feel so sad now he's gone. It's like someone's taken a massive piece of my heart. Just ripped it out of my chest, not enough to kill me, but enough to make me hurt."_

"_It gets better."She was too young to remember Mum and Dad, I could remember a few years with them. But not enough to feel like they were the ones that were meant to protect me. "I promise it does."_

"_I don't think it will Sora."Tears fell freely down her pale cheeks. I put a tan hand to wipe it away, and realized, she'd been in the sun most of this last week, but she was paler than ever. _

"_Have you been eating?"She nodded. I bit the inside of my cheek. "Have you been eating the square meals a day?"She shook her head. I sighed. "Nami, you have to eat properly."_

"_How? How can I eat properly? When I feel like taking the pills out of the bathroom shelf and OD'd?" I began to cry and took her hand._

"_I promised to look after you, when you were little."I placed her hand over my chest. "I promised to myself right here, that you weren't ever going to hurt that much. That even though we didn't have parents, you'd have enough love for three lifetimes. I promised that you were never going to slip through the cracks. I promised you'd always be safe and I'd be the one that kept you that way. Why do you think I wreck Roxas' car so much?" She cried harder when I mentioned his name. I hushed her. "I'm so sorry Nami, I totally forgot. I'm really sorry. I'll make it up to you somehow." Then I realized, I might never be able to make her happy._

_But I'd sure as hell try._

You see I broke my promise; it was my fault Riku knew her; it was my fault he followed her out there, why because I told him to go and get Nami. I broke my promise and I'll never be able to make it up to her. I broke my promise when it was needed the most.

Well, little Namine is calling.

Sora.

X

"Daddy, why are you crying?"I cried harder, it was hard not to cry around little Namine. She looked exactly like her aunt.

"I'm just thinking about my little sister honey." Her big blue eyes widened in understanding and she crawled onto my lap.

"You wanna cry it out with me gone?" I shook my head and then I realized, she may not be old enough to be told, but she was mature enough.

"You see Nami, your Aunt Nami was the sweetest, bravest, most unselfish person I had ever met back then, she was artistic and much like you in more ways than just looks and name..."And I told her the story, from my little sister's birth to the present day.

I wasn't interrupted once.


	2. Roxas's 18th Deathday

Dear Tom, (**N/A ; Yes he calls his diary Tom**)

Nami is upset again, she's been watching over her nieces and nephews and one is just like a little her. Sora was telling little Namine all about her, I had to stop her from going down and being seen. That's one of the rules. Don't be seen. Don't fail on your person. Don't drop any of our secrets into the world below. Too many more to note down.

Eighteen years I've been dead, I died at eighteen years old, today Nami is making me a cake with eighteen written on. But it isn't much to celebrate, but it's something.

Anything to keep us from breaking the rules.

The rules here aren't like laws on earth. They're binding, break one the punishment is severe.

They leave you with scars.

Not any you can see the worst kind.

Emotional scars, they'll do something to someone you love on earth.

Nami still cries over Sora's almost death. I can hear it in the night, when she thinks I'm asleep. It tears me up inside, that I can't meet who would me rightfully my nephews and nieces,

Not until they die anyway.

Which hopefully will not be soon, nobody deserves to die young.

Nobody, nobody that's not suffering anyway.

Nobody deserves to be murdered ether. And I still haven't forgiven myself. For getting killed, for causing so much grief, for being the cause of Namine's death and for causing more grief. One day I might be able to forgive myself, when nobody's grieving us anymore. When nobody misses us.

When I know everyone else has forgiven me.

And I don't know how long that will be, so for now, I'll just put on a brave face, hug Nami and get through the day.

Just take it one step at a time.

I just can't believe Riku killed Nami though, I know he didn't like us but to go that far...

Well, I'll just never know. Nami understands though, _completely_, that he was a lunatic, messed up. But she doesn't think that's gave him any right to kill anyone. I remember talking about it.

And shouting.

"_Namine?" I called to her. I'd been told to come down to the gates to collect someone; I thought it would be my mum or dad. But apparently it was Namine, so full of life, rather sad lately, but still a lot of heartbeats left, a lot of breaths still to be taken in, so much life left, all of it wasted. "Namine!" I shouted a little louder, pushing through the crowd. "NAMINE!" I shouted as loud as I could and she turned around. "Finally Nami, how deaf have you gone in about what? A week?"_

"_Roxas!"She almost knocked me over with her flying tackle hug. "Roxi? Where are we?"_

"_Well," I said, my words going into her hair. "I would think some people would call it Heaven." She smiled, I could feel it more than see it._

"_So, this isn't just a dream then?"_

"_No. I'm your greeter angel, if you find anyone you like more than me th-"I got cut off, Nami pressed a hand to my mouth and frowned._

"_You're the best person I'll ever meet. Why would I want someone better then you?"She unwrapped her other arm from my waist, "Now, if your my greeter ghost does that_ _mean you can tell me how I died?"_

"_Shot by I think you can guess who. If not I can give you some clues, green eyes, silver hair, name rhymes with Piku."_

"_Riku, I think."She grabbed my hand._

"_I don't understand why he did it though, I mean he didn't like you because no matter what Sora and me would talk about you. Epically Sora, I think looking after you for so long you were embedded on his brain, along with Kairi. He hated us both, but why kill you?"_

"_Because he loved Sora."Her voice sarcastic, as we followed the path. " I don't know, because he was crazy? Whatever, but I understand that he did it and he's forgiven and all, but he had no right to kill me."Tears were blurring her eyes. "No right."_

"_Nami."I buried my face in her hair. "Nami, I know he has no right. You had a future ahead of you. A life, a family."_

"_And you didn't?"She practically shouted. "You didn't have a life ahead of you? A family? Me?" She whispered the last bit. "I didn't have much of life while I depressed. Did I?"_

"_Nami, I didn't mean I didn't love you." I pulled her into the biggest hug I could. "I still love you."_

"_Roxas."She said harshly. "Why did you have to die on me?"_

"_Because it was my time to go."I shrugged and before I could say anything she pulled me along the path._

"_You seen my mum and dad?" _

"_Nope."_

"_Oh."_

We eventually met her parents and they were very hard to please. We didn't go back, they thought Nami was a waste of a daughter. Me a waste of space and Sora, well let's just say there were words that I didn't understand.

Spanish. Nami knew it, they knew it, Sora probably knew it. But Nami slapped her mother and stormed off. I wonder what they said...

Well I guess I'll never know. I smell cake, so I'm going to get some as I'm starving. STARVING!

Roxas :(

X

"Roxas."Nami's voice rang through the house as I put down my pen. "You want some of this cake or not?"

"I'm coming!"Running through the house to the kitchen. It was a three-story house, a youth hostel. A place for teenagers to stay, until they want to leave, quite a few girls giggled as I past. Being the oldest (and the most awesome) I get a lot of flirts come my way, which drives Nami round the bend, little does she know, she's what most boys here want. "There you are." Nami had an apron and a little chef hat on. "I know. I look stupid; it was to humour the kids." A lot of shouts of 'hey' came to our ears.

"I don't think you look stupid." I tapped my chin. "I think you look... Hilarious." That got me a face full of flour.

"Hey!" Nami screamed as I threw an egg at her.

And the cake sat on the side, forgotten.

_

* * *

_**So whaddya think? It took a while to get going but...**


	3. Namine's mum

Dear Diary, (24/03/2028)

Sometimes, I wish we hadn't set up this youth hostel. You know? All these pretty teenage girls that make a lot of effort to look good, mostly for _Roxas_. But whenever I tell him that. He _laughs_.

Roxas just doesn't understand. And he'll be reading this so hey Roxi love you, you great dimwit!

So anyway, like I writing, I wish we had never set up this youth hostel sometimes; we had put it up for teenagers who didn't want to live on their own up here. So we are doing a good thing, but it annoys me to no end to see girls twirling their hair, winking at him. One had even tried to kiss him. Well, needless to say she got kicked out.

But there's one thing I hate almost as much as that. When my mum comes to visit, she all but hits me with a stick to make my posture right; she puts things in my cooking and worse she insults and talks to Roxas in Spanish, making him look stupid. I remember a while back when we first met them. (Don't worry Nosy it's in English.)

"_Mum?"I asked through the door, banging with my fist. "Dad?"_

"_Nami, calm down, their probably not even in, we'll come back tomorrow." Just as he said it, the door opened and a woman, with my pale skin and small build. "Who are you? What do you want?" She snapped._

"_Hi, mum. I'm Namine your daughter and this is-"_

"_Sora, my son, I know who he is. I expected you to have grown, but blonde hair? Did you dye it? It was so beautiful before." She pulled Roxas into a massive hug.. He had a very confused look on a face; she'd been talking in Spanish. And as she thought Roxas was Sora and Sora knew Spanish... "Mum? That's not Sora, that's Roxas, he's-"_

"_I'm her partner." He cut in for me. Running a hand through his hair which he did whenever he felt uncomfortable. My mother stepped away from him, sure he did look a little like Sora, but never had anyone mistaken one for the other. "Well, then why didn't anybody tell me before I hugged this thing and mistaken him for my Sora?" Roxas stared at me, his eyes asking what she had said, but to be honest, I didn't think he'd want to know. "Why are you here?"She snapped._

"_Because I wanted to meet my 'loving' mum is she here?" I know I should have been more respectful, but hey, I was angry, this was my mum, she was at least meant to be nice._

"_You rude little girl. Respect your elders, especially your mother, who protected you from harm."_

"_Maybe you did, for a whole two months, yeah. No it was Sora that protected me from harm; he was the one that raised me, even though he was just a few years older than me. So shut the hell up." I spat on her show and went to turn away, but her hand connected to the side of my face. And then Roxas, who probably hadn't understood anything about the whole conversation, except we were angry, stood between us both. "Stop it. Stop it both of you. You're family; sure you haven't seen each other in what, eighteen years? So what it's still the same blood that runs through your veins. A bond can't go much deeper than that."_

"_Family is about much more than blood Roxas." My mum and me said at the same time, me in English, my mum in Spanish. I tried to walk off when we had sounded so alike, but a Roxi stopped me, I'd forgotten how much stronger he is than me. "You should probably let go of me now, I'm about to explode."_

"_You haven't met your dad yet. He seems like someone who could defuse a situation like this." He took my hand and dragged me inside. "Hello?" My dad come from behind the door, "I heard shouting and..." He looked almost like me, the hair, the eyes, even the face shape. "Namine, how much I missed you." And he was honest. I liked honest people._

Roxi was right; my dad could defuse a situation like that and much more. He came over every couple of days or so, just to have a chat.

I've not begrudged my mum for just that meeting, I saw her a couple more times, by choice, but I was never enough for her. I'd never be enough. But enough about that and more about tonight. We're throwing a massive party for him. Not surprise just a party; he was trying to wriggle out of. I love him to pieces; he's more than I'm worth.

Namine.

X

"Namine," Roxas breathed, he was right beside me. "You really think that?"

"Jeez Roxas what are you a ninja, how long have you been standing there? But yes I do." I smiled and if I knew him it was from the start.

"When you wrote down how your mum called me Sora." I laughed, he really was a ninja.

"So, what colour dress do you think would be better? Yellow or white?" He chuckled at this, because he loved pretending to listen. Whatever he said I was going with yellow. "Yellow."He said after a few minutes. "It looks like an ice-cream."


End file.
